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You are here: Home / Archives for Grief

And now you are one.

January 29, 2013 by

Dear Benedict, You are one. This month you learned to answer 'give me a kiss' with a kiss, 'do you want some milk?' with a lecherous look, 'can I have it?' With lots of giving and taking games. You gained tooth 5 and 6, both top ones and managed 3 coldless weeks, learned to say […]

Filed Under: Benedict, Letters to Bene

The big change. School again.

January 25, 2013 by

A while ago, I don’t know where, I think I wrote a little about how  much we felt Amelie was outgrowing being home educated. In an ideal world, this would not be so; if she was the eldest, if her brother had not died, if I hadn’t had the business, or Bene, if she had […]

Filed Under: Amelie, Home Education, School

Why I'm quiet.

January 17, 2013 by

There are all sorts of reasons. One is I’m spending my evenings listening to the Wee Free Men books while making this. Another is I’ve been making these. Because I really want to get back to selling handmade things this year and I have masses of plans and not much time. Then there is crawling […]

Filed Under: Arts & Crafts, Being a Parent, Family Life, Garden, Home Education, Merrily Empire, Thinking Tagged With: family life, grief olympics, new craft shop, thoughts

Our Christmas.

January 5, 2013 by

Apparently I say to my friends every year that I’ve been more frugal this Christmas. And I never have been 🙂 Well, this year I wasn’t especially frugal in £’s but in present terms we went more minimalist. There weren’t really toys this year, only Josie and Bene got anything toy like at all; everyone […]

Filed Under: Being a Parent, Family Life, Freddie, Grief

Coming around again.

December 31, 2012 by

Dear Bene, You are 11 months old. So close to a year. What I wouldn't have given to know you'd make it to the last day of the year. Even now saying that a day early feels like a risk. I've tried very hard not to make your first year about your brother. I think […]

Filed Under: Benedict, Letters to Bene Tagged With: 11 months old

A story.

December 18, 2012 by

Once upon a time there was a woman who had a garden. It was a good garden, bigger than many people could ever hope for, filled with beautiful flowers. None of the flowers were perfect, none of them were necessarily the rarest or most dazzling flowers in the world but it was hers and she […]

Filed Under: Grief, Writing Tagged With: child loss, dead baby maths, grief, grief olympics, infant loss, loss when you have other children

Sad

December 18, 2012 by

My blogging mojo is all gone, though it might be here if there was any time between housework and educating and holiday and taxi driving pantomime dancers around. And everyone else's christmas, which they remembered nearly as late as I did and so corresponding quantities of panic have been detected in those ordering from our […]

Filed Under: Freddie, Grief, Uncategorized

The unthinkable.

December 16, 2012 by

Grief sat heavily on me as I drove home yesterday. It was a day that could have been, might have been, a birthday. A sixth birthday. It's a loss eclipsed now, but not forgotten, even if I might prefer that. Even if it might be more politic. There are days when counting up the missing […]

Filed Under: Grief

Where was I?

December 10, 2012 by

You may have noticed I was away last week, on our annual trip to a youth hostel with friends. I went away intending to do some work in quiet moments but the youth hostel had poor signal and Bene and I were enjoying each others company, plus I had the company of all my very […]

Filed Under: Benedict, Christmas Crafts, Maddy

November you can kiss my….

November 29, 2012 by

It seems November is determined to compete with April for crapola. It's been a really tough month. For the sake of argument we will include here the last two events of October. First there was my cork plugging op, which sadly did not go entirely as planned or hoped. To the best of my knowledge […]

Filed Under: Being a Parent, Benedict, Family Life, Maddy Tagged With: argh, balanitis, essure, eye surgery, illness, stress, swollen thyroid, worry

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Archives 2003-2015

Recent Posts

  • After The End.
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About Baby Freddie

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Recent Posts

  • The End.
  • “The last thing I want to do is document it all.”
  • Big Changes.
  • A Toy or Two to Tempt me to Blog.
  • 11 days. 
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  • Buying for Dad: Perfect presents for all ages
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