You’d think i’d have some inkling of what’s going on by now, i mean i do have 4 of them and i am with them 24 hours a day – and i do put in a reasonable amount of thought about them. But no, i seem to stumble about in the dark quite a bit.
Still. Tammy came over today to sit the 3 others while Amelie and i tried nursery again. Amelie came out with the surprisingly lucid (if you think about it) comment “I do want to go, but i don’t want to go.” For a 3 year old, i think she expressed that fairly well. So we went, to give it another try, and within minutes it was obvious she was perfectly happy for me to leave her. Which given yesterdays performance was a trifle surprising. On the way home though i had a lightbulb moment and came to the conclusion that this is a control thing, not in the negative sense but in quite a reasonable and acceptable sense. Amelie likes to be in control; going to nursery is a big thing and she needs to know she is calling the shots. Well, that is fair enough. I think yesterdays tears were about checking that if she said no, i would listen and when i did listen, that made it fine.
So *Gold Star Mummy* points there i think. Must admit feeling really frustrated for the screaming little boy at the door while i was watchnig Ammi through the window though. His mum held him and cuddled him, promised she wouldn’t leave him then walked in, let a nursery teacher peel him away, turned around and left. Now, i know its not easy, but the last time i left a child like that, Fran was less than 1, accepting a few weeks when it just couldn’t be avoided when Maddy was 6 months or so. And i just feel so frustrated for people who perhaps don’t realise this doesn’t have to be obligatory. I’m just such a different person from the one who thought lying to a small child was okay. (EDIT: Just want to qualify this a bit; i’m not being judgemental of the individual here, though it might seem it, but i do think that we have a system set up completely wrong if it mainly revolves around children being “broken ” from their parents. If we had the school system right, it would start at an age where children were ready to move away to some extent and this whole culture of having weeping children peeled away from sobbing mummys just wouldn’t exist. If Amelie had wept, i’d have taken her home, i only wish she had really.)
Anyway. This morning passed in a haze of normals, maths book boardgames, colouring etc. Fran did some stuff on Richard the Lionheart, which we talked about in some depth (not that i know a great deal.) We talked about how the “infidels” of our story are actually a Religious group we know well, the difference between Religions having an impersonal “hating” face and the personal level of people who know each other, how the Crusades are probably responsible for much of the Worlds troubles since. And yes, you’ve guessed it, she’d quite like to know more. So we’ve got a plan to look at Islam and Christianity in more depth and also try to find out the story from both sides; i think i know the perfect people for that. 😉
All of which did make me think that while i’m not good at fascinating my children with the wonders of maths, something i beat myself up about rather a lot, i am a pretty good resource when it comes to the story of our world historically. And more, how wonderful it is that my children have inspired me to know more about that.
(PS “Scarf ladies” as the girls here refer to you, Tammy and i were wondering about covering Eid at group and then some other religious festivals in the run up to Xmas. Would you be up for that? Would be nice to cover several different religions to give it balance.)
This PM we did some Rainbow Rock, played with Sam, finished off First People and decided to do a Timeline of some of the things we’ve discovered and then the big two played while i fed Josie.
Maddy has decided to give up dancing, she has found the instructions to hard to follow, so that meant only Fran was going to be going. I needed to collect Ammi from Late Club promptly because if you go even a minute over the cut off point you get charged for the next hour, which is an extra £3. I bathed Josie, settled down to feed her, gave Fran a 30 minute warning and reminded her of exactly what she needed to do. 15 minutews later i called out and asked her if she had everything together and asked her to start changing. “Yes, got it all, done it” she called. So, 5 minutes till leaving, Josie finishes and i tell them to go get in the car. At which point it becomes obvious that Fran is not washed, not changed, has not brushed her hair, has not found her missing sodding ballet shoe. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And what i hate about this is that a) she had lied and b) i just start screaming. So i turn into the mother from hell, she cries, we end up driving like a loon to get there, all because she thinks i’ll nanny her into everything (which i never do with this so you’d think she’d have learned) and because she is incapable of putting her uniform and shoes into the uniform and shoes drawer. I mean, how difficult is it? I’m not ferrying her to ballet for the good of my health. 🙄 She does actually want to go, so i mean, come on?
She got her come-uppance today because i charged her the £3 the extra minute cost me, so that is this weeks pocket money gone. *Horrid mummy*
Tomorrow will hopefully have some arty-crafty, hands on stuff in it. We’ve finished ETC4 and are going to take a break from that, so i think we’ll aim for drive-by-normals of a few pages of Singapore (nice and easy for her and clear and simple) and a bit of Smelly Spelling. She and i looked at some CGP History too; might use that as normals for “jumping off” points but really, given its supposed to go up to age 11, its stupidly lightweight. She’d be bored silly with that level of stuff in school. Might get back into a reading book too as she isn’t reading much now all out long car journeys have stopped.
My last thing of the day is the complete warfare that has broken out between Amelie and Maddy. They are being utter bitches to each other and it makes me so sad as up till now we’ve generally had very harmonious sibling relationships. When i think how badly my own relationship with my sister broke down during our childhood, it made me realise tongiht (after they were sent to bed in silent disgrace for a cat fight), that i have to approach this differently. I need to give them some strategies for dealing with the strong natures they have and their different abilities to deal out, deal with anger. Maybe if i start now and give them some understanding of how they hurt each other, the teenage years will be almost bearable.