I really have got blog fatigue – but its a hard habit to kick and today has been so nice, plus the last few days have been a little extra-ordinary and its bothering me not to blog them.
But first, i’ll just clear up the comments thing.
I did turn them off yesterday before i threw a tantrum; i decided i needed a break from constantly checking on them and needed to blog for blogs sake, not to see if i was worthy 😉 So i took temporary ring valium and switched them off as a sort of cold turkey.
Then the day started to go wrong, at which point it occurred to me that it was as well to have them off because if i was going to flounce off in a tearful huff, it smacked of a luvvy attack to be able to come back and see if anyone had noticed 😆 Obviously, i had reckoned without email 😀
AND….. they are slowing my blog down horribly. I’m working on a new template and when its up it’ll have wp comments on it.
And its one less place to inadvertantly offend people. I think i’m possibly being oversensitive but i feel like i barely open my mouth without someone being offended by me, like i’m a greater culprit than anyone else of the occasional indescretion. I don’t know if i am.
Anyway, Tuesday was weird. Even before i had a tearful tantrum, even before i decided the world hated me and none of my so-called-friends *said with ironic comic effect*wanted me about at all and even before i managed to be 50% of one of the most spectacular examples of why email is a bad communication method, it was weird. I feel so flat. Or felt, its improving. I’m in a rut so deep its a wonder i can see over the edges. And i so would like a night of sleep not broken up by someone sucking on me/weeing on me/scratching at me/lying on me/screaming at me/vomiting on me. Oh to be kept awake by an attentive husband. I’m so perpetually sleep deprived now that 5 hours has become some mythical temple of dreams. I’ve even forgotten how to lie in. Its SO easy to forget how much we need sleep and how impeded we are when we don’t get enough. I’m shocked to say i think i’m getting too old for 1am. Oh well, another 7 years and i should free of people who want to keep me awake. 🙄
Then there was the absolutely extraordinary meeting up with a child who meant so much to me 7 years ago and who i have fretted about like you wouldn’t believe since she vanished out of my life. Completely took my breath away to see her again, feel utterly floored to know what she’s been through since. Feeling very fortunate to have the opportunity to make it up to her than i vanished.
And then there was a new baby in the family. Another girl. Always an emotional moment. Welcome Baby ‘Violet’.
Thursdays seem to be turning into a nice day here, not sure why. Its developed a little rhythm that we all like and it works.
First off we did some normals – Fran worked alone on Smelly Spelling and ExTC and Maddy did sums with me in a Learning Explorers book. Love watchnig her do maths, she is so intuitive.
Then we all went off to Sainsburys, got Banana Muffin ingredients and they begged more workbook out of me. (Had to oblige, made me laugh!)
Came home, had a late lunch and then cooked Banana Muffins together – Fran did all the weighing and impressed me loads when i asked her to guess where 85g of butter might be and she got it straight away.
The we got out the clay and made coil pots, Fran’s is really good.
Then she went to Brownies in her uniform for the first time and maddy came home delighted and full of Rainbows.
More days like this please.
Only difficult bits are that Ammi clearly is not happy with idea of nursery and i really don’t know how to play it. Its not like her to lack confidence. And Fran is hugely bothered by something that we’ve come at from an unfortunate angle. I’m totally for being honest with them, but she’s seen and overheard the grim reality before i’ve had a chance to explain it from a more realistic angle and its proving hard to unpick. But we can deal with this.