Slightly better i suppose.

I think i started today with lower expectations (well, given i was howling into my pillow by 7.30am it was a requirement really) and that helped some.

Dropped Maddy off again and then decided that the best way to start was with some one-to-one for Ammi so we got hot chocolate and toast and curled up on the sofa for a snuggle, Auntie Mabel and Tweenies. Which worked quite well and she was a much nicer person for it. In fact, she let me and Fran sit at the table for quite a while, joined us for some drawing but otherwise just got on with her own stuff. She is quite itchy tonight, so maybe she is just out of sorts.

Fran did well; it amuses me that she’ll happily add up coins well into the 60-70p’s but baulks at an addition over 20. Still, she can do it, i don’t care really, it’ll come. She seemed quite impressed by me showing her that 18-15 was the same as 8-5 today and that 17 + 3 was just 7+3+10 and used those quite happily for a while after. She had also absorbed several words from yesterdays bizarre spelling school programme which happened to appear in a Bob Book today. The real break-through came with writing, which she again demanded we do and she produced a set of really good a’s. I tentatively suggested that we could use that letter to practise g and d as well and she went for it and really had a good go. I can’t quite believe i was dumb enough not to spot we could “succeed” at several connected letters in one go like that before! lol! (erm… i think.) One thing that seemed to help a lot today was me reminding her to try not to press so hard; that made a big difference to how much control she had.

After that i decided to quit while i was ahead and she and Ammi played ponies solidly for hours but it was nice playing and i feel like they need the opportunity to forge a particular bond with Maddy missing really, so i just pottered and tidied while they did it. And i’m afraid i succumbed to my general feeling of misery and took them out for a “retail therap” at Toys R Us. Fran got a Mr Potato Head, Maddy got Clickits (I’m a very stylish girl…) and Ammi got a dolly seat. I know, i’m a sucker.

The gymnastics man has been in touch; he is full till after Xmas but then he is opening a special centre with classes every night and at weekends, so that really ought to be do-able. If i can just get organised over the farm as well, we ought to have a bit more of a local life going. Girls adore Teddy Robinson (its doing my head slightly but still) and i just read them the story of the Plagues in Egypt which they found highly amusing. That was one of my favourite studies in A Level RE and i really had to fight the urge to start discussing possible explanations for it with them. maybe another day…

And no, i haven’t asserted myself, he’s booked plane tickets and i’m miserable. I’m a pathetic idiot and i know it.