*Deep Sigh*

Nursery starts tomorrow. Apparently Maddy like nursery better than home and its her school. Okaaaaaay…… I’ve got to get up an do a school run because she has got cold feet about not having P in the taxi and wants me to take her. That’s fine, i want to take her for her first day, its just i don’t really want to take her at all :~(

I’m suddenly feeling like the next few weeks are becoming stupidly stressful. 3 of the last 5 weeks are about to be deeply spoiled by anxiety over the whole “going away” thing and sooner or later i’m going to get upset about it and we are going to have a row. I should have just put my foot down when it was first mentioned instead of assuming that he might use his imagination and think it wasn’t a great idea. I dunno, ten years together and i still expect him to HAVE an imagination. We still don’t have a car (yes dear, i know its difficult, but you have had 8 months now…) and i’m feeling a whole lot more pregnant. Very tied again, just slept most of today.

Apart from my retail therapy visit to Tescos; nothing very exciting about breast pads, but Maddy and i had a nice time. She was good company. We bought a few new clothes, a new top each in H&Ms and tracky bottoms for Moo in Tesco and “the” pink cord skirt for Fran. Which is utterly GORGEOUS and she looks a million dollars in it. She just did us a dance to the slow song from Shrek and i swear Max and i nearly wept. She looked so elegant. I did have to buy the size 4-5 for her though and its still on her hips and to the floor. Hmmm.. 6 1/2 and 2 years smaller than average, plus no wobbly teeth yet. Do you think i ought to be worried at all? Its never occurred to me that she is anything other than minute for her age, but Moo is almost overtaking her now and is certainly heavier; maybe all those anesthetics and bad start have done her some damage. Maybe i ought to be thinking about it.

Maddy showed a flicker of something new today – in the car she suddenly asked how high the sky was. I did my best to explain about atmosphere etc but she just said “Well Kipper can touch the sky and a rainbow when he sits on the cloud” – i did try to explain about the realities of that, but i am fairly sure she thinks Kipper is right and Mummy is mad. Still, nice to see the beginnings of that “greater interest” thing that was so much fun when Fran started it.

I did my best, while in H&Ms to get excited by the boys clothes (well actually i had to work quite hard to get my head round being excited by small clothes full stop, i STILL don’t think this has sunk in) – actually the boys stuff was very cute, i liked it. Its just impossible to imagine! I’ve packed my birth bag, complete with change, 2 light reading books (Meg Cabot), baby outfits, nightie, etc etc. If anything will provoke a nice, on time, accidentally at home baby, that level of organisation will. Lol….

I’ve also managed to stir myself into enquiring about gym and dance classes – not heard back yet but i’ve got round to enquiring. Well done Mummy Moo, as Maddy would say.

And tomorrow, back to a different sort of normal. I wish the summer wasn’t over.